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I could not disagree more with the sentiment expressed there. For me, my sexual submission to a dominant man is not just "a sexy game" - it is at the very core of my being, it defines who I am as a woman. (Not as an entire person, but definitely as a woman.) What I desire out of a committed relationship or marriage is not somebody to support me monetarily, not somebody to "raise my kids," not somebody to hold my hand when I'm sick, etc. What I want is a man whose strength and dominance fill me with passion, desire, and awe; what I want is for my femininity to be powerfully conquered by his masculinity; what I want is the sublime erotic and spiritual bliss that comes only out of this union of extreme opposites, wherein I can worship him as a priestess devoted to her god. And that is all that I have ever wanted out of marriage.

And because that is my highest priority in marriage, I have been unwilling to settle for anything less; so I'm still single. I have always been wary of getting trapped in unhappy wedlock, so I have endeavored to ensure that I don't have to depend on a man for anything else, other than romantic love. That means that I can support myself, and I will not be tied down by children, or a mortgage, or any of the other seemingly irrelevant things that go along with marriage in some people's eyes. I'm willing to sacrifice all those lesser things for my single overriding marital priority of finding erotic romantic bliss with a compatible and truly dominant man. And I'm a pretty good judge of character and dominance, like I said. That doesn't mean that it's impossible for me to be mistaken, of course; but I think the scenario that you raised (later finding out your husband is a switch) is extremely unlikely in my case, and also for most sexually submissive women. But let's consider what would happen in that improbable event.

Quote: "In a moment, he's tumbled from being the god you adore and worship to being the lowest of the low, the kind of man you wouldn't 'let within kissing distance of you.' "

Yes, that's a pretty accurate description of how I would feel in the very unlikely case that I found out my mate was really a switch. It would be a crushing, devastating blow. It would mean the end of the marriage, and my taking up the quest of finding another man to love. I would not have children with him, because I have never wanted to have children. But when you say this: "Maybe you actually are in love with him and have a life together" - you seem to be ignoring the fact that all of that would already be in the past tense, the instant that I discovered that he's a switch. I would no longer be in love with him, because he's not a dominant man; and the life we had built together would suddenly be revealed as a complete sham.


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