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Both my husband and I were married in the past and have children from our previous marriage. The only very slight inconvenience is that my daughter's last name is my ex-husband's last name, so people I meet related to her school or activities think that is also my name. Many people we know also have the same situation, so it's no big deal at all. I just say, "Oh thank you, but I'm Mrs. Miller, not Mrs. Jones."
I have several friends and family members that use their maiden name, or prior married name, for business matters because either they are well-established with that name, or, because their university degree is in that name. But, in their personal lives, such as home correspondence and bills, greeting cards, announcements, etc. they use their husband's name.
I personally love the idea of taking my husband's name, even if I didn't like the name very much. I really lucked out, though, because my husband has a very nice-sounding last name that's easy to spell and pronounce. I do have family members who had nice, normal names, but gave them up to take on their husband's unusual last names, just to be traditional. I'm lucky I didn't have to do that, but I gladly would have! I love the feeling of "belonging" to him by taking his name, but that doesn't mean that you don't love your husband if you don't take his last name. I just happen to prefer it, myself!
My husband has never said anything about this subject, but knowing him as well as I do, I'm sure he prefers that we are "Mr. & Mrs. Miller," instead of "Mr. Miller & Ms. Jones." But, again, to each his or her own!
Mothering a young child does involve a lot of micromanagement but to micromanage an adult seems ludicrous to me. I own a business and have developed an incredible staff of people - men and women - who make wise choices in managing their departments. Our philosophy is that if you've got to micromanage a person, you've got the wrong person, so replace them.
